Now I'm certain that they have their share of strife in their lives.. I'm positive.. but because they choose not to bring others down, they will post something like " Tomorrow will be a better day, but I'm still BLESSED".. oy.. that's nice.. I guess.. do I care? No.. WHY don't I care? because you didn't tell me WHY you had a not so perfect day... if you DID I could commiserate.. but when you DON'T.. all we hear is how HAPPY you are.. and how PERFECT your life is.. that makes you.... well.. PERFECT and we fucking hate you..
We hate how motivated you are.. you get up and eat the perfect whole grain and fruit breakfast and then go and work out and admit to LOVING IT!! newsflash.. the rest of the world fucking HATES it most of the time.. we do it because we HAVE to...
Then you have this entire group of wonderful friends who you go to some wonderful place for lunch and I'm sure you eat a salad with tofu and SAY you enjoy it.. and I'm sure you talk about how wonderful your life is . I'm also betting that, even if YOU don't, the rest of those women go home and talk themselves out of committing Helter Skelter at the very least, and Hari Kari at the most.. because I can bet those shiny happy women are, in reality, hating SOMETHING about their lives..
Are they going home and vomiting? because they need to fit into the facade? Do their husbands come home and beat the shit out of them? does one of their PERFECT children cut themselves in private? probably.. its all fucking fake and I get sick of hearing it
The reality is that our lives suck.. as Gnostics we believe that THIS, this place you are currently living, is Hell.. IS HELL.. it's where we learn our lessons, imparting our experience to the godhead.. Everyone's life is difficult..
I guarantee that all those exercise induced endorphins are making you see things so rosily.. I'm betting your husband or partner ,that is going to work his or her ass off so that you can lead your happy go shopping life, is probably miserable.. I'm thinking he wishes you'd rather lay in bed and make love in the morning, instead of getting up to run 10 miles.. I'm betting he'd rather eat a big fucking steak, instead of tofu almondine.. I'm thinking he wishes his credit card balances were lower..
As for the rest of us.. We eat too much.. we don't exercise much.. because we hate it.. we fuck instead of jogging, we meet our friends After WORK, and often have one too many.. and often we have troubles.. getting pregnant, NOT getting pregnant.. paying the bills.. Not taking that one last drink.. not doing a drug that makes us forget that we aren't getting pregnant , or that we can't pay that bill..
We all have those flaws.. and we take pleasure in being there for our friends.. sending our support when one goes in for brain surgery.. or has a scare after that last mammogram.. or when our kids struggle to lose weight or are struggling with our divorce. We enjoy the self disclosure of our friends.. that is what makes us friends.. We don't enjoy hearing about all the shit that you have or do that is BETTER or EASIER than the stuff WE do.. We like to commiserate .. but then we also like to applaud a friend that has had decades of trouble and loss, when her idea becomes a reality, setting her up for a secure retirement..
I don't find these shiny happy people encouraging.. I don't find them inspiring, I don't feel happy for the ease of their lives and their apparent successes.. I find them loathsome..and phony. am I just jealous? hell yeah I am.. I want to be a shiny happy, lady who lunches.. instead I can't get a job, because I actually like my dreadlocks.. sorry.. I live in a cave and I swear I'm losing my sight and starting to adapt using sonar like a bat. I have few friends and they all live far away. I completely lack motivation to change any of that.. and don't tell me to fucking exercise..
Come on.. what's your flaw? what is it, you shiny happy person you? what is it.. inquiring minds want to know. If you don't start sharing, I'm going to fly over there with my shiny, newly adapted bat wings.. and bite your tight and spandex covered ASS..
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